hospitality

I love inviting friends into our home. It's such a gift to be able to prepare a meal and share it with friends. Since we've been renovating the kitchen (and other spaces) in our home, we don't have people over too often. Earlier this week, my husband told me how he loves that our somewhat in-hospitable home drives me crazy (think half painted walls and unfinished counter tops) because it reminds him of how much hosting means to me.

I've been thinking a lot about hospitality because Thanksgiving is getting close. I haven't had what most would consider a traditional American Thanksgiving in years. Growing up, my Thanksgiving usually consisted of sharing a meal with my nuclear family of four. We always lived a good day's drive from other relatives, so getting together for turkey was a rare occasion.

And then when my mom passed away in 2001, I learned how to cook a turkey (and the whole Thanksgiving meal). Even though it was a lot of work for three people, I will always treasure those years of calling my Granny when it came time to put the gravy together. For about four years, I would pull out my notes from the previous turkey dinner, and review with her just when to add the flour/water mixture to my boiling turkey drippings (seriously, gravy still haunts me).

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Since I was in high school, I dreamed of having a big family like they always show in the movies, with a children's table and lots of adults gathered around a large beautiful table brimming with food. I thought I would marry into a big family and I'd get to take part in something like I'd imagined. I looked forward to the day I'd be one of many, rather than three or four sitting around the Thanksgiving table.

We'll share our Thanksgiving meal with friends in Boston for the third year in a row. We often end up with a group of young professionals living hundreds of miles from our families. It may not look like a movie scene or have a perfectly decorated table. But hospitality isn't about looking like you labored to create a perfectly picturesque meal. It is about making people feel welcome and loved.

Even though my Thanksgiving meal may not be what I at one time imagined, I wouldn't trade our friends for anything. It's only a week away and while I may not know everyone I'll eat with. I do know there will be too much food. We will laugh, share stories and eat pie. And best of all, we will give thanks.

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Where will you spend your Thanksgiving?