When I first read
Hayley's post
100 Golden No's my stomach knotted and I couldn't fathom
wanting to hear NO 100 times in a year. I kept reading and I kept thinking about this concept. The idea is that the more opportunity you seek, the more opportunity you will have and along the way you'll conquer fears of hearing the word NO.
Since my
word of the year is
ready, I feel I should take this challenge on with gusto. What am I afraid of? There's even a
pretty download for the 100 No's to print and hang out so you can track them. I thought about it for weeks and now here I am admitting that I printed it out and am using it as a reminder.
But you know what else I need to admit? I have already checked off more than one NO. There was one NO that felt particularly painful. I didn't want to hear it and was fearful it would arrive. But I am left wondering what the closed door will allow to come my way. I don't simply tell myself "something better will come along," because that doesn't usually work. I'm not one for pat answers or band-aids. Instead, I have to go through the situation: to grapple with the ugly, raw hurt and emotion on being shut down.
I have experienced disappointments before, and know I will again and again. So rather than telling myself something better will come along, I believe something different will come: the opportunity that is
meant to be.
Waiting is hard. Discernment is necessary. And so I'm seeking wisdom in the midst of opportunity. And I will continue to find opportunities and check off the NOs. Think I'll reach 100 this year?
What are you seeking this week?
GIRL. Whew. This is such a scary concept. I really want to challenge myself, but I am, like you, getting an icky, tight feeling in the pit of my belly just thinking about it. I think being a people pleaser makes this even harder. Still, it really has me thinking and I might need to give this a go. I so admire you for going for it! I also will be praying for you and your heart concerning your most recent disappointment.
ReplyDeleteGlad to know I'm not alone on this being a scary one. Thanks for your words of encouragement :)
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